In the Silence of Things

For my Spiritual Formation class at college, I was given the assignment to go sit in complete solitude, away from distractions and people, for an hour straight. We were not aloud to do anything, no reading, no listening to music, no guided thinking, no praying, and no talking. After the hour was up we had to write a paper about our experience. I wanted to share mine with yall.

Silence. Stillness. Two things of which I often times never get in my life. I constantly have noise. Before I started my hour of solitude I prayed that God would reveal to me what I needed to gain from this experience. What I have come to learn is that my life is filled with just that, noise.

Part of what God revealed to me is that I have been going to the wrong things to find rest. I have been running to worldly things to restore me when I should be running to God. When I take mental breaks from homework I usually watch netflix or scroll through social media. God revealed to me that doing those things are not helping me mentally, physically, or even spiritually they are just simply prolonging the work I have to do. They are not making me mentally refreshed to finish the task at hand. I feel as though this time should be spent in solitude, a walk, getting away from distractions. Maybe just for ten minutes or even five would be sufficient.

I think God is telling me that the way I spend my free time is useless to me and His kingdom. God is not saying that I can never watch netflix again but when I do, do it in moderation, maybe that be one movie or two episodes a day. Nothing too much especially filling our heads with nonsense. That goes the same with social media. I think God can use social media for His kingdom, but the devil can also use it for his. Nothing too much. Do everything in moderation.

I also think this hour gave me a sense of stillness which to my knowledge I have never felt in my whole life. I’m always on the go. Even when I am in conversations, my mind is somewhere else. My auto pilot is on 24/7 when it comes to other people. I try to be a caring person, I try to listen but I don’t make it a priority to care for God’s people.

Though I struggle with showing appreciation to God’s people, I struggle even more with His environmental creation. I don’t particularly like the outdoors because I am allergic to everything. So I decided to do just that, to get out my comfy, cushioned, air conditioned space, I went down by the Speer Pavillion. First I started by sitting on a porch swing and watching the river flow. I could hear all the birds chirping and the sounds the river made when a big gush of wind collided with the water. I also heard a train then an airplane, my two favorite sounds. They have always reminded me of home, (I live by train tracks and the Texarkana Regional Airport). I listened closely and closed my eyes and a sense of peace washed over me. I then after about 30 minutes went and laid on the top of a nearby picnic table. I looked up and watched as the clouds moved. As they formed together then tore apart, how they went from light to dark, changing in shape every few seconds.

After about ten minutes of cloud gazing I got up and walked around the trail that is by speer pavilion. I looked at the trees. They were tall, some were bigger around and some were small around.One tree in particular had fallen down but it’s roots were still in tacked. It looked as though a storm knocked it down. I thought about my own life and how when I go through storms and get knocked down I always find myself going back to my roots. I wanted to touch them because the way they were intertwined with each other was so beautiful. I wanted to touch the flowers that were planted by the trees, but I know I can’t, I am allergic to plants, grass and trees. Then my brain started to wonder why God made me allergic to the very things I love, things that are of such beauty. I think He was actually asking me, “Why won’t you go to the people I love, the ones that are so beautiful?” this made me think about all the people I walk past and never speak to because its incovent for me.

All in all this experience was one to remember. Nothing profound, God didn’t ascend from the heavens, but He did show me that I need to go to Him for rest, do everything in moderation, and I need to love his people. If I am going to be an International Missionary I must first learn these things and secondly learn to witness where He has put me, right here, right now.

So my hope and pray for yall is that yall learned something from what I have learned. And as always I'm praying for you!